sing when you're wanking
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Monday, December 31, 2007

Nah nah..nah nah nah nah..hey hey...Goodbye!

While others usher in the new year by downing a drink or two, yours truly is seriously in danger of doing a merlion at the stroke of midnight. For the second year row, the last day of the year was spent pigging out at Kuishinbo (that restaurant with the Jocie Guo Mei Mei-sque irritating "bom bom bom" jingle) crippling and devouring the flesh of Alaskan crabs and basically stuffing myself silly with food. So if you smell something reminiscent of puke, congratulations, you are on the cusp of a new technology. One of transmitting smell over the internet.

Better make this post a snappy one before I really puke on my keyboard. At the start of the year, I was about a month into my first ever job. After going through the initial learning and acclimatisation phase, work became pretty blah. Thank goodness for the wonderful colleagues, past and present (and hopefully future too, chio bus please come join my department!!), for making it a fun place to work in. However with the desire to continue in this current role waning by the day, let's hope the new year would bring along a brand new job opportunity.

Oh wait, the urge to puke is gone. Thumbs up for the overworked digestive system!

2007 was also a pretty good year in terms of personal health. 2006 provided a few health scares but besides the few times earlier in the year when I almost blew my lungs out from my nostril and also the torrid LS Monday, there was a much welcomed absence of any major ailments. No hemorrhage from ruptured piles, no third nipple, nothing of that sorts. YAY to good health!

This one is for those who have expressed genuine concerns for my love life. 2007, as with previous years, had been a barren year. Not that I haven't been trying, just that square pegs will never fit into round holes. Love to me, is something best left to fate. No point going around looking for companionship just to fill that void in your life and end up both parties. Just my personal thoughts. For those who have been asking whether have I been hiding in the closet all these years, don't worry, I won't be going around seducing your boyfriends and husbands. At least not yet! Lastly, thanks to those who are always trying to match make me or recommend some nice gals to me. I'm not such a good person as you all perceive me to be, so unless you want to wreck the lives of your gal buddies, it's advisable to steer them away from me lah!

Shit...this is taking more time than I wanted to. Better chop chop finish this and nap.

Year 2007 did not see me becoming a milli-millionaire as I originally hoped for. A huge chunk of my pay went towards paying for my CFA examinations and buying earning my class 3 driving license. Despite a heartfelt plea to the God of Fortune, I wasn't one of the lucky winner in the Chinese Toto draw. This year I resolved not to work harder and earn more money, but brush up my Mandarin so as to write a Chinese letter appealing to God of Fortune to hand me some of the bountiful windfall.

This is fast becoming the longest blog entry ever...

Here's my favourite part of the new year, coming up with an "annual report" for the previous year. First off, lets review the resolutions made for the previous year!

Resolutions 2k7

Exercise more

It is amazing that I managed to stick to my (sometimes bi/tri) weekly gym regime, even at times my old creaky knees are protesting against it. But I guess it's a case of mind over body since this is like the only (healthy) way to shed the kilos.

Project 90 in 365

When I hit 94kg sometime in July, it seemed that the lofty aim of reaching 90kg wasn't such a far-fetched delusional thought as initially perceived to be. However the weight loss plateaued after that and an additional 3kg crept back into my frame after the gastronomically pleasing trip to KL. Subsequent binging at Swensens (thanks Ooof!), dim sums at East Ocean and the above mentioned Kuishinbo meal signaled the cracks in my determination in breaching the big 9-0. Now I'm where I was back in July. Who is willing to bet that the 7 kilos can be shed in Y2K7?

Learn Driving

27/11/07. Haha.

Learn to cook

Seriously, I can't remember lighting up the stove in 2007.

Find the courage to shave my hair for Hair for Hope 2007

Sorry, I chickened out on this. Not that I have much affinity for my hair. Just that a huge part of impressing at work is through your image. I'm not sure an Orge-like figure would impress others. I thought of compensating by shaving my armpits, but Tang Wei make bushy pitts fashionable again. Too bad.

Be actively involve in community service again

Had a fun and fulfilling time volunteering at the Read-with-Me program. Hur hur, Mr. Stammering Incoherent Mumbler teaching kiddos reading. What irony. However with CFA Level 2 on the horizon, I wonder if I still have the time to actively participate in volunteer work in this coming year..

Be a regular blood donor and hopefully an apheresis donor

I felt real bad for not donating even once this year. The first time I was turned away due to a niggling sore throat. I forgot that the Blood Centre doesn't operate on public holiday when I dropped by during Hari Raya.

Rekindle my interest in photography

Nuff' said.

Reinvent myself

Do remind me to show you the state of the art 34631654 in 1 utility gadget that I have stored in my belly button. You can do things ranging from listening to mp3s, surfing channels, trimming your nostril hairs to even spellchecking with this mini-extension of my belly button. Quality stuff!


Movies that I enjoyed 2K7

The Simpsons Movie

Doh! Simpsons. Big screen. Mmmm..nice...

Ratatouille

After this and the Simpsons, I will break the neck of the next person who proclaims animated features are for kiddos.

The Lives of Others

The poignant ending alone is worth the ticket price.

Half Nelson

The role of a disillusioned teacher who find solaces in drugs is terrificly fleshed out by Ryan Gosling.

The Last Kind of Scotland

Forest Whitaker won an Oscar with his interpretation of the Ugandan dictator Idi Amin, who alternates between endearing to psychotic. Personally would have preferred Ryan Gosling to clinch the award.

Fracture

Oooh, I just love how Anthony Hopkins engaged in a battle of wits with young legal attorney Ryan Gosling in one of the more enjoyable suspense thriller of the year.

Grindhouse

Campy acting, checked. Lousy dialogs , checked. Exploitation of skimpily dressed chicks, checked. Helluva fun, checked.

Hot Fuzz

Heh heh heh. One of the funniest movie this year. Definitely put a new twist to the copper and partner genre.

Lust, Caution (the uncensored version)

You saw this coming, didn't you. Yes, the movie is dominated with talks about the sex scenes. But by putting those scenes in context with the whole story, it is an intense story of love and betrayal between Tang Wei and Tony Leung.


Albums that I enjoyed 2K7

张震岳 - OK

一致以来就很欣赏阿岳的歌曲。这张专辑少了些态度,但也增添了许多柔情。

推荐曲

路口
OK
思念是一种病

陈绮贞-花的姿态演唱会经典实录

还记得在演唱会前的几个星期几乎每天都听着这张CD来酝酿看 concert 的 mood。听她现场,跟录音室没差别。她的音质就是那么的好。

推荐曲

全部!好啦,就推荐以下两首

灵感
旅行的意义

陈奕讯-Listen to Eason Chan

听陈奕讯,还是听唱粤语歌的他比较动听。要听到真正的Eason,就必须听他诠释动感的快歌。这张收录了许多然你随着音乐而舞动的快歌,会然你从头High到最后第二首歌。因为专辑最后收录了一首和整体概念非常不match的电影主题曲《兄弟》。

推荐曲

演唱会
乜嘢啫
Crying in the party

蔡健雅-Goodbye and Hello

买这张专辑时并没抱着太大的期望,但期望越小时,surprises也毕竟更多。非常喜欢第一首的《达尔文》所描述人如何经过每段感情而成长。我想Tanya也是这样的吧。刚结束了一段感情和换唱片公司的他,这张专辑也交出非常好的成绩。

推荐曲

达尔文
空白格
当你离开的时候

曹格-Superman

个人觉得曹格和Eason的音乐路线非常相像。两位都拥有吧辣脍炙人口的K歌,但演唱起快歌时也非常动感,非常的High。就拿这张专辑Superman来说吧,里面所收入的《天使嫉妒的生活》和被杨综伟与萧敬腾拿来PK的《背叛》,不懂在KTV里被点播了数万次而快歌如《三-七-二十一》也诠释的非常有Feel,非常的High!

推荐曲

背叛
天使嫉妒的生活
三-七-二十一

苏打绿-无与伦比的美丽

往往听到独立音乐这四个字时,普罗大众们总会掀不起怎么兴趣来。个人觉得听众们被那些电台所播放的较容易接受的主流音乐给宠坏了吧。独立并非属于inferior quality。翻着来说,主流也并非一定是好音乐。因害怕加入了大公司后会compromise了他们对音乐所拥有概念,热诚和执着,他们以独立音乐人的生份发专辑。一向很有ideas的他们在这张碟里的整个concept做的非常好。从第一首歌到最后一首的音乐都是linked起来的,非常有画面感。特别需要提到《白日出没的月球》,整首歌的曲很有层次感,很多不一样的编曲,不仅然我连想到Queen的Bohemian Rhapsody。苏打绿并非只有一首《小情歌》而已,恳请大家走出你的safety zone而尝试听一听他们的其他用心所创作,演绎的歌曲吧!

推荐曲

白日出没的月球
这天
无与伦比的美丽


Memories of 2K7

The mass pandemonium when Eason Chan performed 《怎么样》 during the encore of his inaugural concert back in January.

Yours truly appeared on the national press! Also the splendid night at the ulu Woodland, lapping up everything that Soda Green dished out.

How I upped my cultural quotient by watching The Phantom of the Opera. I can still remember the hair at the back of my neck stood when the introduction of the titular track first rang out.

The unforgettable September night at Singapore Expo. 4 months later, 5 encores later, the memories are still firmly etched in my mind.




Finally done. This must be the longest, most time consuming post ever written. I should just revert to posting pictures of Po Chai Pills.

Happy 2008 to all. May you be blessed with good health. And hope all of you don't tio TOTO this year, and let me be the chosen one.


(Not so ) Random Video of the Year


Fuck off 07, Hello 08!


posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 11:13 PM
Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Happy Christmas and a Merry New Year!

Christmas was ushered in doing what I do best...eating.

A day after whining about the kilos gained after the KL (food) massacre, I was back to my element gulping down bak chor mee, satay and or luak at the 85 market. And mind you, this took place approximately 3 hours after my "healthy" dinner fare of yong tau hoo.

Perhaps I needed something uplifting after sitting through the screening of the bleak Will Smith's vehicle, I am Legend. Perhaps...I should stop finding excuses and watch what I eat.

Putting that aside, wishing readers a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year or a Happy Christmas and a Merry New Year, whichever tickles your fancy. Be good or Santa might just do a John Terry pee in your socks come next year.

Random Picture of the Day

siew_mai
Ai mai, ai mai, jiak siew mai

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 1:50 AM
Monday, December 24, 2007

96.something something

Maybe the dip in the weight over the past year has lulled me into thinking that I'm incapable of reversing the trend. The recent trip to KL has resulted in a gain of *gasps* 2 kg over a 3 days period. However looking back at the stuffs I ate, it is amazing that I only managed to gain 2kg. Let's do a breakdown of the stuffs I had stuffed (pun intended) into my mouth during the trip;


Day 1

Lousy Ramly burger at JB stopover
3 Dunkin Donuts washed down by a sour cup of iced latte
Ban mian, with a clear broth
KL 026
Kerepoks
Double scoop of Famous Amos ice creams topped with cookie crumbs
Tze Char at tourist trap
Beef noodles with beef jerky, and the bounciest beef balls I've ever savour!
KL 041
Iced Luo Han Guo and Longan concoction
Potato Chips

Day 2

Continental Buffet breakfast
You Char Kway
Deep fried glutinous rice
Teh
Waffles ice cream at Baskin Robbins
KL 044
Kenny Rogers, which sucks
Claypot Rice dinner with 2 slab of stingrays and a plate of cai xin
KL 048
Iced Luo Han Guo and Longan concoction
Fucking delicious Ramly Burger from a stall situated at a busy road junction
KL 050
1 egg and 2 kosong pratas
Potato Chips

Day 3

Dim sum
KL 058
You Char Kway
Egg tart
Century Egg tart
Salted Egg tart
Duck Feet Bao, which was the single most fucking delicious thing I ate in months. Will post the picture once I get my hands on it.
Half pint of Baskin Robbins

Die lah! With only less than 7 days left to the end of 2007, how to lose than extra 6 kg??!

(Note to self: Don't book a hotel that is just a stone throw away from Chinatown for subsequent trips.)

Random Picture of the Day
21122007
Reason why cow tongue isn't a delicacy in most countries

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 12:11 AM
Thursday, December 20, 2007

KL in the eyes of Mr. 保济丸 (Po Chai Pills)

Amelie has her garden gnome, I have my Po Chai Pills. Without further ado, I present to you "KL in the eyes of Mr. 保济丸"

KL 003
Ooof not exactly impressed by the presence of the Poh Chai Pills.

KL 009
Don't fret when you gorge yourself silly with donuts, Mr.
保济丸 is here to save the day.

KL 005
Ooof slightly impressed by the presence of the Poh Chai Pills.

KL 016
Mr.保济丸 at the Petronas Tower's skybridge.

KL 040
Little known fact about Mr.
保济丸, his English name is Roberto. And Mr. Ro-ber-to was spotted in a KL eatery that specialized in ripping off tourists.

KL 046
Mr.保济丸 muttered that excessive feasting on ice cream is bad for one's digestive system before
turning his back on the Baskin Robbins ice-cream.

KL 063
Mr.保济丸 , all battered and worn out, taking a much needed rest at the hotel room before heading back to Singapore.


Random video of the day


催泪歌王楊宗緯演唱《聽說愛情回來過》。


在朋友那儿听说
知心的你曾回来过
想请他替我向你问候
只为了怕见了说不出口
你对以往的感触还多不多
曾让我心碎的你
我依然深爱着
在朋友那儿听说
知心的你曾找过我
我要他帮我对你隐瞒
只是怕见了面会更难过
我对以往的感触还那么多
曾给我幸福的你
我依然深爱着
有一种想见不敢见的伤痛
有一种爱还埋藏在我心中
我只能把你放在我的心中
这一种想见不能见的伤痛
让我对你的思念越来越浓
我却只能把你把你放在我心中
对你的声音你的影你的手
我发誓说我没有忘记过
而关于你选择了现在的他
我只能说我有些难过
我也真心真意的等过

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 10:59 PM
Thursday, December 13, 2007

The men simply don't get it

My jaw almost hit the floor when I heard the price of the engagement ring; around 8 thousand dollars!!! Although the ring does look nice, all I know that a piece of stone,which wasn't even close to the size of my booger on a bad air day, certainly doesn't warrant that price tag. 8 grands, 8 bloody grands can get me a lifetime supply of kway chap!!

Remember the UOB Ladies Card tagline "The men simply don't get it"? In the movie Lust Caution, what makes Tang Wei betray her country over a piece of (outrageously huge) diamond? I wish I know, but I absolutely fricking can't bloody get it!! What's so alluring about a piece of stone? If I do, I wouldn't have said this to my colleague...

tyw: I think I want to marry a visually impaired girl next time.

colleague: Why leh?

tyw: So she doesn't get to discern the diamond on the engagement ring I give her.

(Alternatively, this blog post can be retitled to Why tyw can't get a girlfriend?)

(Not so) Random Video of the Day


Not me, doh! You know who you are, congrats!

秒针分针滴答滴答在心中
我的眼光闪烁闪烁好空洞
我的心跳扑通扑通地阵阵悸动

我问自己要你爱你有多浓
我要和你双宿双飞多冲动
我的内心忽上忽下地阵阵悸动呜...

明天我要嫁给你啦
明天我要嫁给你啦
要不是每天的交通烦扰着我所有的梦
(要不是停电那一夜才发现我寂寞空洞)
明天我要嫁给你啦
明天我要(终于)嫁给你啦
要不是你问我
要不是你劝我
要不是适当的时候你让我心动
(可是我就在这时候害怕惶恐)


(Ps: I will be in KL over the weekend, hope I don't get wash away by the flood or get detained over ISA)

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 7:48 PM
Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Visa

Pre-Christmas 058

Gift: 20 dollars

Meal: 25 dollars

Company of such great buddies: Priceless

Me looking like a moronic buffoon: Hopeless

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 8:29 AM
Sunday, December 09, 2007

All hail tyw, The Supreme Conqueror of Mountain

013

He, who single handedly fend off the incursion of the marauding primates.

He, who negotiated through the slippery and treacherous terrain.


He, who despite the odds heavily stacked against him, conquered all of the 163.63 meters high Bukit Timah mountain.

He of course, is The Supreme Conqueror of the highest peak in Singapura, TY...W!!!

Random video of the Day


原来演唱会也可以那么如此的感动,催泪。。

苏打绿 - 这天

够深刻了吗来躺下吧
让我轻抚你安慰伤害我后的疲累
够尖锐了吗看我的疤
用温柔包覆勇敢给喘息的你笑脸
生命从来不觉得自己对谁该负责任
太多虚伪情节的表面模糊陌生的眼
请让我在你身边一起穿越这条街
请让我在你身边一起纪念
够痛快了吗我知道啊
躲在你利刃之内骄傲的自卑作祟
够鲜艳了吗血染的花
被你刺满的双手此刻擦乾你眼泪
生命从来不觉得自己对谁该负责任
我们看了编造的谎言就如此轻易
将彼此划成碎片
太多虚伪情节的表面模糊陌生的眼
请让我在你身边一起穿越这条街
请让我在你身边一起纪念这一天
总有一天我们都死去
丢掉名字的回忆再没有意义
总有一天我们都忘记
曾为了一个越演越烂的故事伤心
总有一天我们都叹息
笑着缅怀有过的愚蠢的美丽
就让现在过去
让我握你的手让你握我的手
彻底了解颤抖你会知道我
让我握你的手让你握我的手
彻底了解颤抖你会知道我
让我握你的手你会知道我
让我在你身边一起穿越这条街
请让我在你身边一起纪念这一天
透过我的眼泪看你的脸
自由是我们需要的特权
你笑了我笑了笑了这一天

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 5:57 PM
Monday, December 03, 2007

Public Service Announcement

Korea 200

This is a public service announcement. Bear masks are not contraceptives. Be safe, practice safe sex.

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 11:33 PM
verbal ejaculation









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