sing when you're wanking
Friday, July 29, 2005
These days, Singaporeans seem to have a penchant for coming up with weird names for themselves or their offspring. Before you start flicking magazines, story books, phone directories etc to find a name, let tyw advise you on some of the names to avoid.
TIM TAY/TEY (Hokkien for being in the way)
For the Mr. Tay and Mr. Tey out there, be sure to steer clear of the name Tim. Tim Tay Tim Tey ( a hokkien word for being in the way) , you think anyone would want to hire you meh?
MONICA CHEN (Hokkien for groping the ass)
Unless you want to be perceived as a sexually hormone charged pervert, choosing Monica as your name wouldn't be exactly a wise choice.
HAUTE GAN (Hokkien for letting a pig hump you)
With the word Haute seemingly in vogue these days, some impressionable young punks might contemplate choosing Haute as their name, with disastrous outcome if their surname is Gan
DICK CHANG (Chinese for Long Dick)
Having Dick as a name is already a cannon fodder for bad puns and crass jokes. Of course, it would be worse if your nick name is Chang......
(Chinese for Worms/Hairs/Tumours/Vegetable growing on your dick)
If you think being a Dick is bad, being a Dickson is worse. It is likely that everyone will start to take an interest in your personal hygiene and sexual habits.
STEVE KOK/KWOK (Stiff Cock)
I'm sure it's pretty hard to stand up to the occasions if you have such a name.
HARRY KOK/KWOK (Hairy Cock)
You must had be a dog in your past life.
AARON KOK/KWOK (Errant Cock)
What's wrong with having the same name as a Heavenly King? Perhaps the name isn't as reassuring as your girlfriend/spouse would have like it to be.
LAMPARD ZHENG (Hokkien for Swollen Testicles)
Finally a word of caution for the soon to be Mrs. Zheng. If your other half is a Chelsea fanatic, don't ever let him name your son after Chelsea's No.8 Frank Lampard.
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