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Sunday, May 07, 2006

The "I have a hole on my tongue and live to tell the story" post

First off, pictures of the "hole" as requested by Ooof.

Notice the black circle?

A closer view of it. Don't bother scrutinizing on my nostril, it's clean of booger and nostril hair.

Before i elaborate on the whole "hole-filling" process, i would like to thank those who offered their well-wishes and suggestions on how to heal the ulcer.

The Process

No, it's not rat poison.

While i have heard of using salt to combat ulcers, i dimissed the idea of using it as it smacks of masochism. However after 2 weeks of mouthwashes and medicalgel i decided to give it a shot, especially after how hufferphish exalted the antisceptic quality of salt by describing a scene from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. (O o)

So the moment came. At around 2:30am, on a night when the squirrel decided to invade Highbury, i literally rubbed salt on my wounds. While the pain from the first few ulcers were bearable, tears just flowed when salt came into contact with the biggie. It was so bad that my tongue was shivering uncontrollably for one minute and saliva just dripped all over the place. Surprisingly after a few minutes, the pain subsided and i actually kinda enjoyed the whole process. Maybe i should try dripping wax on it the next time round.

Long live Liang Teh teh teh teh ............

While salt is a good combat agent, relying solely on it will only result in high blood pressure and the inevitable cardiac arrest. (cue polite laughter) Once again hufferphish volunteered that drinking liang teh will solve all sorts of ailments, and she once overcame her *BeeP* problem by drinking it. Being eager to eradicate the ulcers problem once and for all, i actually spent 12 dollars on 3 bottles of it and finished every last drop of it within a day.

Within two days, the holes were almost non-existent except for the biggie which reduced to a quarter of its size. A few days after that, i was back snacking on my keropoks and chips.

Random Thought of the Day

MOE should revamp their grading system since 66.6% is now regarded as a strong performance.

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 8:20 PM


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