sing when you're wanking

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Monday, August 27, 2007

Trilingualism

Heeding the government's call to be effectively bilingual, I was intending to ink the characters, 游唱自慰者, The Yodel(l)ing Wanker in Chinese, on my back. That was of course until PM Lee's vision for the nation to be effectively trilingual, his wish for the future generation to be fluent in the Malay language.

Great! Now I need to find more room on my back to incorporate the Malay characters of The Yodel(l)ing Wanker. And how exactly do you write The Yodel(l)ing Wanker in Malay?

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 11:05 PM

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Sunday, August 26, 2007

妈妈，我可以不要去上班吗？

NO!!! It's going to be Monday again. Can I just feign death and not report to work? Sigh, this week promises to be one of the toughest week at work. Jenny Su, you will be missed! :(

Random Quote of the Day

"圣诞公公应该是带少一样礼物，所以借了你的脚踏车来用用。不用怕，今年圣诞节他会还你一辆的。"
James explaining to gaozi, whose bicycle was stolen on last Christmas Day, that his two-wheeler was merely borrowed by a Santa Claus who was running low on gifts.

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 10:49 PM

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Sunday, August 19, 2007

妈，我出名了！

My obsession with appearing on the newspapers has been rather well documented. Over the years, I have seen my peers gracing the nation's broadsheet for reasons ranging from their academic achievements to their participation in pageants. Given that I'm far from outstanding in both the intellectual and aesthetic departments, it begins to dawn on me that the only chance(s) that I may get feature is by perpetrating unlawful acts or through the obituary section.

But hey guess what, I was featured on 13th August of 联合早报 - zbNOW’s version of Where's Waldo?

Can you find me?

Now, can anyone recommend me a good place to get a nice picture frame?

Random video of the day

一人一半, off the OST of the brilliant local production, 881.

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 10:48 AM

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Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Ideal vs Reality

In an ideal world....

You: Boss, can I don't work OT tonight?

Boss: Why?

You: It's the lunar seventh month and I don't feel comfortable working till late, you see...

Boss: It's the lunar seventh month!? No wonder I feel chilly tonight. Let's go home together.

In the real world....

You: Boss, can I don't work OT tonight?

Boss: Why?

You: It's the lunar seventh month and I don't feel comfortable working till late, you see...

Boss: Seventh month, Eighth month, Ninth month, IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT MONTH IT IS! If you don't work OT tonight, the only time you will be working come next year is during the lunar seventh month! Now go back and work.

Random Picture of the Day

End of the joyride

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 10:54 PM

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Sunday, August 12, 2007

The miseducation of tyw, yet again

Erectile Dysfunction

Kah kwee kwee, tan tua lui. （脚开开，赚大钱）

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 10:42 PM

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Saturday, August 11, 2007

天胡

A: 哦，洗牌不要那么大声leh,我parents在睡觉leh。

B: Oops, paiseh lah。Miscue, miscue。

A: 干你娘，每次miscue，再miscue我就翻桌子liao。Haha。

B: 人有失手，马有失蹄mah。Haha。

C: Haha，又不见得你把丢失掉你的蓝鸟。。

B: Oei!

D: Nabei lah! 不要再kaopehkaobu了lah。At this rate, 我们打完后，MacDonald breakfast 都卖完了lor。

A：KIN 啦！快点排牌啦！

B：Okay, Okay!

。。。。。。。。。。。。

C：大家又没有花？

A：我铺了。

D：我有两支，等一下hor。Ok，铺了。

C：Oei! Mai zuo bang, 你铺花了没有？

B：Paiseh, miscue。还没还没！

C: 干！

。。。。。。。。。。。

A：Oei, 庄家打牌leh!

B: Eh, eh! 等一下!

D: 等怎么？等投胎ah?

B: HAHAHA! 各位观众朋友，传说中的天胡即将在你们的眼前亮相！HAHAHA！我去拿camera 拍下这刻classic moment！快，快，你们去打给《晚报》，叫他们派记者下来做独家访问！HAHAHAA！

A：Wu yea bo!? 给我看看。Wah，真的lei!

D: Ni Nai Beh, 真是有够suay!

B: BWAHAHAHAHA! 我是麻将界的奇才！

C：Oei！天胡你的Lan lah！我是庄家，你怎么可能天胡leh？

D：HAHA！出老千，拖出去砍手！

B：Eh，对吗。。我有十四张牌leh。Eh, 为什么我会有十四张牌啊？Hon Gan！

C：HAHA！ Think 你刚才铺花时，铺多一张牌！大相公，诈胡！Ho seh! WOOHOO!

D: 诈胡，可以赔到你siao! HAHAAH!

B: Eh, misuce lah。　不要算leh！Friendly!

A: Friendly 你的Lan lah! Woohoo, 今晚我们的 Defu Lane Butter Crabs 有早落了！

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 4:11 PM

1 comments

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Cosfest 2007

A while back, I posted this picture.

In retrospect, it was a bit of shameless camwhoring but it was all done in the name of fun during the annual cosplay event, the Cosfest 2007, that was held about a month ago.

Although this picture seems to suggest that I'm enjoying some kind of rear penetration...

One of the main highlight of Cosfest 2007 was a photo opportunity with her..

Readers may find her familiar as she is a favourite eyecandy of mine. You can find her previous photos here and here.

Of course I wouldn't miss the chance to pose for a picture with 031, who is becoming a regular fixture in the local cosplay scene. This time round, she brought along a friend who came down all the way from Kuala Lumpur. PASSION!

Chick and gun. Lovely.

Mr. Stormtrooper getting in touch with his more feminine side.

First, Stormtrooper with a butterfly. Now Darth Vader pruning trees. What's next? Darth Vader appearing on Martha Stewart?

Chioest cosplayer of the event! How I wish I'm the teddy bear.

Most intimidating chick of the event...

Hur..er.. Mum, think I soiled my pants.

I look like the Great Khahli besides this Undertaker. Rest in Piss.

Haruhi in Bunny Suit! Damn guitar obscuring the view.

Cosplay events are mostly graced by people dolling up as characters from Japanese mangas and animes, so it's a refreshing change to see someone masquerading as Death from the peerless Sandman series.

SD Gundam!

Hehe.. I'm as huge as a robot! *Does the Robo dance*

The darling of the show! So so so kawaii!!!!!!

Another year, another Cosfest. Still can remember the first Cosplay event that I've visited in 2005. Same gal, same pose...but yet so different...

Fat boy Wai with chio Cosplayer..circa 2005.

Random recycled picture of the day
(first appeared here)

Majulah Singapura!

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 10:21 PM

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Saturday, August 04, 2007

Cheer is coming!

As Cheer Chen is pointing out, she's coming for a concert on the 29th of September! Yayness! And this time she will be staging a full scale concert at Max Pavilion, instead of the smaller scale one she did at NTUC Auditorium two years back.

Ticket price ranges from 58 to 138 dollars, and the sale of tickets will commence on the 10th of August at all Sistic outlets.

What a brilliant start to the weekend! WOOT!

Random video of the day

posted by Stormtrooper's Lackey at 8:36 AM

0 comments